I wish I Was as strong as you.

So beautiful.
So strong.
Why can't I be as strong and as beautiful As you?
I'm weak.
Stupid, and weak.
disgusting.
Ugly.
Revolting.
Why are you even here?
I was asking myself that.
Not you.
I deserve this because I'm a horrible disgusting person.
Weekend of 'fun'.
Just my weekend of torturing myself.
Making out I'm fine, but I'm really not.
I love watching you leave just for a second so I can get rod of everything I've dissapointed myself with.
But it's too late.
It's already deep inside me and unable to escape.
God, please help me.