I don't respond well to shock

I never have.

I think i've always been pretty protected by both of my parents, which I loved.

I've been feeling slightly down this evening, I couldn't put my finger on it.

Then I rememeberd today was my Nan's Birthday, she would have been 91.

My family are Were close. We were all told she would die, she didn;t seem ill. She seemed fine.

Then one day after PE, me and my cousin went home. She wasn;t well.

She was laying on the couch.

She NEVER lay on the couch.

14 days later.

After christmas.

She died.

I was shock, extremly shocked and didn't actually feel the total upset of it until 4 years later.


I now have things happening now.

My parents don't love eachother anymore. How can that happen? How can you just stop loving someone?

How does that AXCTUALLY happen.

I havn't been well for a while.
B
SH
Depression.

But I wanted to get better.

Now I feel back in at square one.

I don;t even WANT to get better.

I don;t want to be here.